The end of..... Our life

The end of.... Our life

Today wake up... First step

Shower, feed the kids, eat... Nah I'm not hungry.

Search of apartments, Jobs, Strength.

Call Lindsey get her to watch the boys while we take my name off every bill we ever had.

Watch the man I love cut me out of our life together and do it with no emotion whatsoever.

Now I am sitting in the passenger of his truck, that I won't take from him in this mess in exchange for the PS3. Wondering how am I gonna start all over? How?

How can I look for an apartments and jobs and watch my 11 month old crawl around on the floor and try to find the end of the sippy cup that's leaks the water. Without wondering how am I gonna explain to him when he is old enough to understand that mom couldn't manage to be good enough for his daddy? He won't know that mommy loved his daddy more then anyone. He just won't know he will have never witnessed the tenderness that used to be there.

How do I move forward when I really don't want to?